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And then she suddenly burst into tears. They were silent tears, but tears nonetheless. Tears that came from deep, deep inside her. “It’s not that I’m not thin. It’s because I’m fat. Nobody wants to go out with a fat girl. No one wants to make love with me. Everyone looks at me and all they see is fat. Fat. Fat. And fat.” Ella squeezed Fatima’s hand. “Don’t be silly, Fatima. It’s not what you look like that’s the problem.” “Yes it is. Yes it is. You don’t know, because you’re thin. But I’m not. I’m fat. And all anyone can ever see is a fat person.” Ella wiped the tears off Fatima’s face with a tissue. “Being fat isn’t the worst thing there is. I used to have a bit of a complex about my figure too. I guess that’s why I’m so skinny. And I guess that’s why I fuck everything that moves. You know. Lack of self-esteem. I dunno. I’m not a psychologist or anything. I used to binge eat and vomit when I was a teen. Bulimia. You must’ve heard of it. I don’t do that now. Too busy fucking to. Was she seriously waiting for an answer? What possibly could I say? I had thought her asleep, I had waited long enough.It was so dark, it had to be impossible for her to see anything - that was my first thought. The next was that I had inadvertently moved upon the air mattress - so that I feared she could not help but realize what her teenage son was doing.I felt like dying from the humiliation of it.With the voice not so unlike a mouse in an animated movie to my own ears, "What do you mean mom?" I wanted to take my hand off my nearly soft member and to pull the loose shorts back up over my balls and dick - yet, I dare not move... could not move from fright. She would surely know the truth of it if I had."Its OK honey!" She a small amount of compassion to her normally stern voice and rather than calm my fear and degradation, it only inflated it. I had guessed years ago, that her perpetual anger toward me was because I was starting to look more and more like dad as grew into manhood..
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